Nowhere
In a town where everyone
knows everyone
the girl who never connected is
an outsider.
School, recess, friends:
I do not belong here.
Family, holidays, gatherings:
I do not belong here.
My own mind, never operating right:
I do not belong here.
My own body, uncomfortable and ugly:
I do not belong here.
How do I get better
survive the day
when every place I go, every choice I make
feels wrong?
In a town where everyone
knows everyone
and everything about each other
I know surprisingly little.
People ask, Are you a small town person or a big city person?
I just assumed I was a big city person
considering the smothering town
I am escaping.
But now the city
is dizzy
and lonely
and swallowing me
whole.
I do not belong here.